Little Shop of Horrors

Hello Everyone! Cindy here.

Last Saturday I met a new creature. It looks like a human...arms, legs, hair and eyes all in the right spot. But this creature’s keen sense of smell can sniff out fear and confusion with great accuracy. It has an innate ability to detect a bargain from miles away. And it can stare you down until you plead for your mama. This creature is called the Garage Saler.

In an attempt to lessen the amount of things I have to store away in my very kind Grandmother’s basement, I held my very first garage sale. I had never done this before, but all my friends told me it would be a lot of fun. I spent a great deal of time pricing my many items and got up bright and early on Saturday morning to set everything out. We had just set up the tables and had carried out the first couple of boxes of things when we were spotted by one of those Garage Saler creatures. He sped down the street, quickly parked his truck, and hopped out. It was 6:20 in the morning!!!!!! Come on! We were clearly not ready but he walked through anyway. This was my warning....my little sign of what was to come.

By 7:30 we were swamped with people. And by 8:00 I was cursing those friends who said that a garage sale would be fun. It was not fun. These Garage Saler creatures are sneaky, aggressive, and often rude. People were bringing over huge arm fulls of things and offering me $5 for what really totaled up to $30....and then were shocked when I counter offered with a larger number. One lady wore one of my shirts as a dress...and told me that I WOULD take $5 for that "dress" and two other tops. When I said no, she stomped away very angry...then returned a few minutes later and offered $6. I watched a few people try to leave without paying. Two ladies filled baskets I was selling, and after buying only the things in the basket, tried to leave with the baskets. I still don’t know who walked off with my tea pot. It was incredible.

The expert Garage Saler comes prepared. Some have fanny packs (called bum bags for you Australians) full of coins. Some have mini tackle boxes with coins sorted into compartments. All have the courage to haggle with you over 25 cents. An experience I NEVER EVER want to repeat....no matter how much fun people say it is (LEANNE!).